Is anyone still out there?
If so, I owe you an apology. I didn’t intend for it to be this way. When I started this blog, I was excited to be cooking all the time and to document my recipes for you. It was not only an online recipe collection for me, but it was a way of interacting with others, especially those people who were once in my life or are still a part of it emotionally but maybe not physically (you know what I mean). Having lived a few different lives and met so many wonderful people along the way, this is my way of reaching out to you.
At the time of its creation, I titled my blog No Such Recipe with the intention to documenting my exploration into the world of food, in creating new and fun ways of doing so. Although I found inspiration in other food blogs and recipes, I wasn’t interested in simply following someone else’s measurements and ideas blindly. Through these first few months I accomplished a lot culinarily: I took risks in cooking foods that I’d never encountered, I sought culinary mentors and absorbed all that I could, I developed a genuine passion for quality and variety of ingredients and I grew my own culinary identity. These are accomplishments that I will carry with me always.
Although I continue to cook regularly and still find much gratification in my cooking, I have felt less desire to document every kitchen encounters on my blog. It was never really my intention to have people follow my recipes meticulously, rather I had hoped that people would use my ideas to get in their own kitchen and step outside their culinary bubble.
I still haven’t found my groove yet. I want more out of this blog than simply banter and recipes. I want fulfillment and expression without structure. I want to get to a place where my relationship with my blog is a source of inspiration, expression, communication, and contentment. I want meaning.
Onwards, I will write when my mind has something to say, photograph when a vision speaks to me, and cook when I am in the mood. I want No Such Recipe to reflect my original intention as an outlet for personal expression first and foremost. This, I’ve come to understand, is the ultimate meaning behind the title, in creating the recipe for a life that is my own.
As of late:
I have become much more focused on what I eat and how it affects me. I have focused my awareness on my health and well-being. This is a physical awareness as well as a mental one.
I’m striving to live in the moment, each moment. And to remind myself of this when I lose sight.
Present, aware, healthy, cozy, inspired, overwhelmed, optimistic, curious, nostalgic. This is how I’ve been feeling.
Yoga, bouldering, soccer, rainy day jogs. Spending time with my puppy. Drinking and exploring tea. Reading about natural medicines and health benefits of foods, juicing lots of fruits and veggies. Appreciating the creativity in Portland and taking it all in, especially in the form of seasonal beers. Basking in the dreary fall weather and colorful leaves all over the ground. Zombie pub crawls and watching The Walking Dead. This is mostly what I’ve been doing.
The terrible devastation of Sandy and how I wish I could do more to help. Old friends and those who I haven’t seen or spoken to in a while. Whether I want to ask inquire about working prep for Imperial and in general get more involved with the food production aspect of the restaurant. If I want to invest in a season pass to Meadows on Mount Hood, how I miss Aspen but am stoked to find out what winter’s all about in Portland. How to create a positive and comfortable living space, if I want to seek a new place to live in Portland, and my incessant desire travel the world. The holidays. Aliens and other mysterious things beyond our comprehension. How I can best use my new cast iron skillet. These are some of the things I’ve been thinking about.
Breakfast sandwiches, butternut squash in any and every way, soups and stews, cornbread, pumpkin muffins, various juices. These are the things I’ve been cooking lately.
I hope you’re enjoying your November. Be well, friends.